When you try to bring in the old self improvement or try to improve your life, wellbeing or perform better people often start with productivity, motivation or mindset. You know, the new colourful calendar, the new morning routine or even just telling yourself you got this.
But it is so much harder to perform with a body that doesn’t feel safe.
Building capacity when you’re dysregulated? It’s tough
Growing, learning and thriving when you’re body is trying to protect you… very hard
This is why the foundations of all my work, especially my 1:1 somatic coaching, is always safety.
Safety > Capacity > Performance.
Because without safety, we’re making it very difficult for everything else to stick
WHAT SAFETY REALLY MEANS.
Safety isn’t about thinking you feel safe, calming yourself down when you’re angry, or even the classic telling yourself you’re fine when you’re not….
Safety is a physiological state.
It’s the moment that your nervous system recognises that;
I’m not under threat
I can breathe
I can connect
I can be here
I can think clearly
I am okay to be here
Safety is the baseline, the foundation and the starting point for every inch of change and growth that clients experience in UNBOUND.
WHAT DOES NOT FEELING SAFE IN THE BODY ACTUALLY LOOK LIKE?
I say this over and over, a lack of safety isn’t just pulling your hair out, feeling like you’re having a breakdown and burning out
It often shows up in the every day like;
- Overthinking
- Feeling on edge for no clear reason
- Wired but tired
- Shallow upper chets breathing
- Tension in the jaw, shoulder / body
- Freezing when you want to speak
- Feeling disconnected
- Constantly scanning your environment.
Your body is trying its best to protect you – even if the threat is old, internal or unconscious… it’s still a threat.
This is why safety comes before anything else.
WHY SAFETY MUST COME BEFORE CAPACITY.
Capacity is your ability to
- Hold pressure
- Navigate stress (because we need stress, we just need to know how to work with it)
- Stay grounded in challenges
- Regulate and feel emotions
- Recover quickly
But capacity can not grow in a system that is already overwhelmed.
If you’re body is overwhelmed, it is going to prioritise survival over growth every time.
This is why people often say things like
“I know what to do I just can’t seem to do it”
“I freeze when I need to speak”
“I shutdown when things get touch”
“I can’t think straight when I’m stressed”
These are often capacity issues and capacity only expands when safety is present. This is the heart of nervous system regulation.
WHY PERFORMANCE COMES LAST
Performance in work, home, to be creative, to connect, to build relationships is often a natural outcome of a system that is regulated.
When safety is established… capacity increases and performance becomes more effortless.
When we’re trying to perform without safety we’re
- Pushing
- Forcing
- Bracing
- Burning out
- Disconnecting
- Emotional
But when safety is present we experience
- Clarity
- Presence
- Cliarty
- Creativity
- Connection
- Resilience
This is why Safety > Capacity > Performance works.
We work with physiology first.
HOW DO WE CREATE SAFETY IN THE BODY?
Safety is built through signals to the nervous system and improving interoception (our awareness of sensations in the body.)
Here are some simple ways to begin
- Gentle slow nasal breathing
- Grounding into your environment
- Orientating to your environment using your senses
- Noticing tension in your body and releasing it
- Pausing before responding
- Checking in with your internal state and noticing what you need.
These small gentle practices start to build the conditions for safety in the body which then creates the conditions for capacity and performance to grow.
IF YOU WANT TO EXPLORE THIS IN YOUR OWN BODY…
If you’re tired of pushing, forcing and trying to think your way out of stress… this is where the breath and somatic work changes everything.
Inside UNBOUND, we work with:
- your breathing mechanics
- your nervous system patterns
- your stress responses
- your capacity to hold pressure
- your ability to feel safe in your body
Safety should not be a luxury.
It’s the foundation of a healthy, regulated, resilient and fun life.
If you want to explore this work, you can learn more about my somatic stress coaching here.